


Five Times Kirk and McCoy Couldn’t Get Married (And One Time Kirk Insisted)

by pimpmypaws



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Angst, M/M, Minor Character Death, Romance, marriage fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-10
Updated: 2013-03-10
Packaged: 2017-12-04 22:25:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/715774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pimpmypaws/pseuds/pimpmypaws
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the prompt: McCoy's a little old-fashioned about that whole groom can't see the bride before the wedding thing. This means they keep having to putting it off until tomorrow because there keep being reasons the captain and the CMO have to be in the same place at the same time. Finally Jim's all, okay, seriously, I have had my eyes closed this entire fucking meeting and that's going to have to count as close enough because we are getting married right goddamn now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Times Kirk and McCoy Couldn’t Get Married (And One Time Kirk Insisted)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for space_married on LJ.

One

It was early, far earlier than any sane man was awake. Jim Kirk wasn’t a sane man, though. He was a horny and excited man. He quietly let himself into his fiancé’s, soon to be husband’s, quarters and walked confidently into the dark room. He didn’t need to turn on the lights to find McCoy, who he could hear snoring gently in his bed. McCoy’s quarters were just as familiar to the captain as McCoy himself, so he succeeded in easing himself into bed with the snoring man without making a sound. 

McCoy jerked roughly as Kirk’s weight fell on him and he called gruffly for the lights. They brightened instantly and he frowned at Kirk’s grinning face.

“Dammit, Jim!” He exclaimed, sitting up suddenly and shoving Kirk away from him.

Kirk fell back into the wall and grabbed onto McCoy’s arm to keep him from falling into the space between the bed and the wall. The look of shock on his face was almost immediately replaced with anger. “Jesus, Bones, what crawled up your ass and died this morning!”

McCoy yanked his arm back as soon as Kirk was stead on the edge of the bed. His fists clenched and released where they rested against his thighs, almost as if he might lunge forward and ram one into Kirk’s face, but they eventually relaxed. Everything else about him remained tensed, from his stiff jaw to the words that came out of his mouth.

“We talked about this, Jim,” he said, obviously making a clear effort not to shout. “We talked about this.”

There was a moment of silence before Kirk realized what he’d done wrong. When he did, his confused and angry expression fell away to be replaced by utter dismay. “Wait, you were serious? I’m not sure that not seeing the bride the day before the wedding thing really applies to us.”

For a second Kirk was absolutely sure he was about to get one of those fists square in the nose and he almost ducked just in case. 

“I’m not a superstitious old fool,” McCoy told him, his voice raising despite his best efforts to stay calm. “But with all the damned stupid risks you’re always taking, I’m not going to do anything to jeopardize our future.“

Kirk hesitantly reached out to grasp McCoy’s hand, glad that he allowed him to and relieved that he now had slightly more control in the situation. “I’m sorry, Bones, I didn’t know it was so important to you.”

“You better contact your mother and tell her we’re changing the date.” 

Silence.

“Jim, I’m not telling her, you’re the one who screwed this up.”

“Wait,” Kirk said. He took his hand back, but edged closer. “We actually have to reschedule?”

McCoy sucked in a deep breath before finally looking Kirk in the eye. “Yes,” he growled. “We have to reschedule because I refuse to become a widower in six months when you get your stupid ass killed. We can’t afford any bad luck.”

“You can’t be serious,” Kirk said, folding his arms over his chest. “Everything is planned!”

McCoy shook his head and edged closer to Kirk, who withdrew slightly, wearing the same frustrated and injured look. “Well, we’re going to have to change the plans.”

When Kirk’s expression didn’t change, he took one of Kirk’s hands in his and kissed the back of it lightly. He trailed his fingertips up his arms and nestled his hand into Kirk’s hair, twining his fingers around a few longer strands. McCoy sat up and kissed him gently, trying to erase the feelings of rejection. Between kisses he murmured, “It’s okay, I’m not mad at you. And I know what you came here for. We don’t have to stop.”

Kirk clutched onto his wrists for a moment, leaning into the firm touch and kissing McCoy back fervently. When they pulled apart for breath, Kirk found himself staring into McCoy’s eyes, the two gauging the other’s reaction. 

Unable to look at him, Kirk used his grip on his wrists to push McCoy away gently.

“I’m not really in the mood anymore,” he said, untangling himself from the blankets, averting his gaze.. He stood and walked towards the bathroom, leaving McCoy sitting alone, hard as he’d ever been, and feeling like he’d just kicked a puppy.

“I’m just trying to keep you safe,” he muttered to himself.

Two

The ceremony was going to be on the bridge, of all places, and Admiral Archer had just beamed aboard for a last minute, day before rehearsal. Although the admiral was retired and had too much difficulty getting around attending most official functions, he considered it a personal favor to Kirk. As such, he made no comment about not having one of the grooms present at the rehearsal.

Kirk fidgeted slightly as he stood in front of Archer, his fingers wiggling in the grasp of Nurse Chapel, who was standing in for McCoy. He kept his eyes fixed just over Archer’s right shoulder, trying not to look at Chapel. She was perfectly calm, merely doing her part to help out, but she picked up on the tension radiating off her captain and kept glancing at him worriedly.

“…and then you’ll exchange the rings,” Archer said. 

Kirk’s eyes slid over to the admiral’s face from where they’d been studying his right ear. Archer was many years older than the last time they had met. He was wrinkled and stooped over, almost unrecognizable as the man he had once been. Seeing a man that had been a hero, had two planets named after him and was President of the Federation, gripping onto a console for support, humbled Kirk. For now, he was the Captain of the Federation’s most advanced ship, but someday he too would be unable to stand unaided.

As his thoughts wandered, imagining the path his life might take towards where Admiral Archer now stood, McCoy twisting in and out of the story, he felt Chapel’s hand pull out of his grip. He glanced over at her, but she had already darted forward to grab the Admiral’s arm. Archer was sweating profusely and had started sinking towards the floor, his legs unable to support his weight.

Immediately Kirk snapped out of his reverie and he hit the button on his console to open a comm channel to Sickbay. “Dr. McCoy to the bridge for a medical emergency,” he snapped, before rushing to the Admiral’s side.  
The ancient man was lying on his back as Nurse Chapel ran her tricorder over his body. It beeped and whirred, but Kirk ignored it and her. He grasped the Admiral’s hand and was comforted by the returned pressure. 

“I’m alright, I’m alright,” Archer muttered, struggling to sit up, but Nurse Chapel put a hand in the center of his chest and pushed him back to the floor.  
“That’s for Dr. McCoy to decide, not you,” she told him sternly. “You’ll stay right there until he arrives.”

As she finished speaking there was a familiar swish as the turbolift doors opened and McCoy stepped out. Kirk stood and briefly made eye contact with him, communicating both his worry and his relief that he was there to help in the moment before McCoy was at Archer’s side.

He placed a hand on McCoy’s shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Make him better, Bones.”

The Admiral was rushed to Sickbay, where he was watched over every minute by the best doctors available, but when McCoy returned to their quarters that night he was shaking his head. The two men fell into bed, wrapped up in each other’s bodies, as McCoy shook with silent tears over losing the greatest hero in the history of the Federation.

Three

Kirk walked with an extra bounce in his step towards the turbolift, almost shaking with excitement and pre-wedding jitters. They had waited months to reschedule the wedding, out of respect, and they were both eager to just do it. 

Even though it wasn’t really his thing, he had just been visiting Sulu to discuss the flowers. He didn’t particularly care what flowers were where or, indeed, if there were any flowers at all, but McCoy was expecting a traditional ceremony, right down to a flower girl and someone carrying a bouquet. It had taken them right up until right then, the day before, to settle exactly who would be stuck with that particular part of the tradition.

As he approached the turbolift, the doors slid open. Kirk spun around and shut his eyes as quickly as he could, but still caught a glimpse of his perturbed looking CMO.

“Dammit, Jim!”

Four

A new date was set for the wedding, everything was planned and ready to go, a perfectly healthy officiate had been located. And this time, Kirk knew better than to surprise McCoy with sleepy morning sex the day before. 

In order to avoid any mishaps or chance meetings, the turbolift incident still much too fresh in both their minds, McCoy had requested a day’s shore leave on the planet they were orbiting. To Kirk, it said something about how eager he was to get the ceremony over with that he was willing to brave transporting anywhere alone, so he allowed the request. It seemed to be a peaceful society, although Kirk admitted to not knowing much about the culture, so he saw no harm in his fiancé spending a day wandering the marketplace and admiring the local flora and fauna.

At least, he didn’t see any harm in it until Uhura received a transmission from the surface that McCoy was being held by the authorities for violating moral standards. Kirk amused himself briefly with thoughts of what moral code McCoy could possibly have broken, possibly being grumpy too loudly or saying ‘dammit’ too often, as he rushed for the transporter room, but worry overrode his light mood. 

It turned out that McCoy had attempted to resuscitate a woman in the street who had had whatever her species’ equivalent of a heart attack was and this was the only planet anywhere that took offense at life-saving medical care. Apparently it was considered an affront to their gods to attempt to prolong life beyond the years which they had been naturally granted. 

When McCoy and Kirk were standing back on the Enterprise, side by side on the transporter pad after hours of negotiating for the doctor’s release, Kirk leaned into McCoy. The doctor almost shook him off, almost broke away from the contact, but Kirk snaked an arm around his waist to hold him close.

“I’m proud of you,” Kirk said, leaning his head against McCoy’s shoulder. “Even if they aren’t.”

Five

When the orders from Starfleet came through that the Enterprise would have to make an emergency stop on Makus III to deliver some urgently needed medical supplies, and that the captain and the chief medical officer were both required to be part of the landing party, well, it was the closet Kirk had ever come to begging in his life. 

“No other ship can go?” He asked again, sitting forward in the captain’s chair and staring intently at the viewing screen. 

The admiral who had delivered the news shook her head. “You’re the only ship close enough to get there in time.”

Kirk’s face fell. He was almost willing to disobey the orders, to sabotage his own ship so they wouldn’t be able to go, to make any number of increasingly pathetic excuses for why they couldn’t possibly bring aid to a troubled planet. The whole crew had the flu. Scotty broke the warp core while trying to make love to it. He had a turkey in the oven.

When it occurred to him that those excuses might not work, he desperately threw the truth out there. “Look, Admiral, I’m getting married.”

She nodded. “I am aware of that and offer my congratulations. This is a short mission and it won’t interfere with your plans in any way.”

Kirk stood, raking a hand through his hair. “You don’t understand,” he said. “Bones and I can’t see each other the day before the wedding and if we head to Makus III now we’ll arrive the day before and then Bones won’t let me marry him and this has already happened four times and please, I just want to get married now.”

He was shaking with nervous energy and gave the admiral his best cheeky grin to cover it up, but all she offered a small smile. “I’m sorry about the inconvenience, but the orders stand.”

The screen flickered off and Kirk sank back into his chair. The bridge crew quickly looked away, trying not to show the pity they felt for their captain. Uhura, though, watched him sadly for a few moments before turning back to her station. 

It took Kirk a few minutes to get up the courage to hail Sickbay. “Bridge to Dr. McCoy,” he said. “Bones, we have to talk.”

Plus One

The wedding was rescheduled yet again, for the day after the day after the Makus III delivery. Kirk had been told it would be quick and easy. They would beam down to the plane, he would go over some diplomatic garbage with the leaders of the settlement while McCoy distributed the supplies and evaluated the conditions of the medical facilities, and they would go home.

Those were the plans. It was frustrating, but it would be a routine trip and they would arrive back on the Enterprise with plenty of time to avoid one another before the wedding. Unfortunately, the plans didn’t account for a surprise attack by the rebels whose attacks had caused the shortage of medical supplies in the first place.

In the resulting chaos, the landing party was separated. Two ensigns and McCoy were picked up by the transporters, just as a group of rebels located their hiding place. When they materialized on the transporter pad one of the ensign’s shirts was stained dark red from the shot he’d taken to the chest. The Enterprise bridge crew scrambled to locate the captain on the planet, having no luck with their scanners and eventually sending down Spock with another landing party to search on foot.

Spock was not surprised to find the settlement nearly destroyed upon their arrival. Smoking ruins replaced what had been state-of-the-art facilities. Bodies scattered the landscape, most of the settlers, but a few rebels they had managed to kill before being overwhelmed. Further exploration led them to what had been a government building, which was guarded by rebels carrying large spears and phaser-style weapons at their hips.

Despite their impressive looking weaponry, the rebels proved to be clumsy with their spears and had poor marksmanship with their phasers. It took very little effort for Spock and his team to get by the guards outside the building. A lieutenant limped along due to a smack he’d received in the knee from a spear, so he stayed behind when the away team entered the building, keeping watch for more rebels.

The building was evidently used to house prisoners at some point, as in the basement there were still holding cells. They were old-fashioned and not difficult to break into. Spock would have wondered why the Captain had not been able to release himself, considering how primitive his restraints were, but when he saw the condition that the Captain was in he knew there had been no possibility of him ever freeing himself.

Spock pulled his communicator from his pocket and flipped it open. “Spock to Enterprise,” he said clearly, keeping his eyes on the Captain and the medical officer that was leaning over him.

“Uhura here,” came the reply.

“We have located the Captain. Five to beam up.”

They materialized in the transporter room to find McCoy already there, waiting anxiously to see Kirk. The injured captain was being supported by Spock and the medical officer, and even though he was weak, he beamed when he saw McCoy.

McCoy rushed forward, shouldering the medical officer out of his way, something he made a note to apologize for later, and took over bearing Kirk’s weight. He was sweaty and bloody, but McCoy had never been happier to be touching him. It was worrying to him that Kirk never protested as they proceeded to Sickbay, and when they arrived he hurried to locate and treat the worst of Kirk’s wounds. It seemed that whoever had attacked him had been wielding one of the daunting spears Spock had seen the guards carrying, as he had a deep puncture in his side.

He was calling to Nurse Chapel to prepare a hypospray when Kirk lifted his head and reached out to grab McCoy’s wrist, missing and thumping him in the elbow instead.

“Wait, Bones, wait,” he said, breathing heavily between words. “Where’s Spock?”

McCoy continued moving the dermal regenerator over Kirk’s body, but looked puzzled at his question. “What do you need Spock for?” He asked, wincing a little as Kirk’s movement caused blood to ooze from the puncture. “And stop moving around like that, unless you want to bleed to death right here.”

Obediently, Kirk let head sink back onto the biobed. “We’re getting married right now,” he practically growled. “I haven’t seen you in three days. It’ll be extra lucky.”

There wasn’t even a moment’s pause before McCoy turned to shout to Nurse Chapel, who had just appeared around the corner with the hypospray he had requested. “Hail Spock and tell him to bring the rings.”

*

“Do you take this man to have and to—“

“Yes, yeah, I do.”

“And do you take this ma—“

“Get on with it, Spock.”

Spock arched an eyebrow and gave the Doctor a bemused look. “In that case, I now pronounce you to be married under Federation law.”

The few witnesses, Nurse Chapel and two other patients, clapped softly as McCoy swept down on his husband and kissed him slowly, thoroughly, a smear of blood from his hand ending up on Kirk’s cheek. They smiled at each other tenderly, aware of the eyes on them but not caring. It was only Kirk’s belabored breathing that brought McCoy back to the current situation, and he straightened up with a fierce scowl on his face.

“Now everybody get out so I can make sure I’ll still have a husband come morning.”

*

“Bones, if I don’t make it through thi—“

“Shut up, Jim, you’re going to be fine.”

“But why—“

“I just wanted everyone to leave us alone.”


End file.
